I tend to have a lot of dreams that I recall when waking up. There are some that I laugh off like one about getting chased by a giant cockroach in my apartment. I hate bugs. Most others seem to be significant on a personal or spiritual level.
Roughly a week, I prayed a short prayer asking the Lord to reveal what was going in my heart that night.
It took place in a single story home with a few bedrooms and minimal furniture. A simple home with white painted walls, nothing of significance in regards to decoration. Upon initial introduction to the house, it felt peaceful, like a sanctuary. The sun had already set and the others in the house slept as I stood in a room alone. In this room, a worn-out, single wooden pew sat against one wall. On the opposite end of the room, a small platform lit by deep red colored lights.
I took the jewelry I had & began throwing it into a small black rectangular hole to the left of the stage. The gold jewelry and the pearls I kept close to my chest now as a secret sacrifice into this unknown black hole. I danced around, honestly oblivious to what I was doing until I heard a banging at the front door. I peeked from out of the room to see my brother and sister asking what they needed to do. My initial response was to grab a barstool and knock on the door in response. The return banging grew louder and louder. I started to snap out of the trance state I was in and began backing up, mumbling words to the door, asking for them to go away. The banging grew louder as my verbal response also did.
I woke myself up saying, “Go Away!” over and over. My cell phone flashed the time at a little after 2am. Almost immediately, Matthew 7:7 came to mind, “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.” Right after this, I kept hearing these questions, “What are you playing with? What are you giving sacrifices too? Whose door are you knocking on?”
Quite the heart check from that evening’s prayer.
This past week, I felt like I can’t get away from this dream and its implication for the Church at large. If we as individuals are truly aware of being a part of the Body of Christ, then we have to yield what we do in our private lives for the sake of others. What we do in our private lives will affect those within the congregation. I cannot help but think my biological sister and brother are representative for my ‘brothers and sisters’ within the Church.
Like in the dream, my inattentiveness to where I cast / sacrificed my pearls (Reference: Matthew 7:6) affected the safety of the household. My response lacked any faith or wisdom in knowing how to protect the house. My response to knock back shows a lack of spiritual maturity. Frankly, this is due because I kept secretly sacrificing my time in my private life to things that wasn’t unto Him. And who knows how long I had been in that red lit room for. Let’s be clear. Countless hours scrolling captivated by media is the same as being caught up in an addiction.
The dream is calling out what holds our attention. How can any of us expect to serve one another when our hearts and minds have been in captivated by otherness for countless hours?
Personally, I have a few things to reevaluate and repent of. If this hits you in a certain way, I pray it bring you to a place reflection of your own and to receive mercy as you pray through it.